Why do you do this…..

I was asked this question this past weekend a couple of times while standing over a bbq pit in a fair amount of pain that is part of recovery from surgery I had on Thursday. No, they didn’t have the gumption to ask it openly with their voice, but I could see it in their eyes. One after another staring at me wondering why in the heck I would stumble outside to stand in pain to watch the meat of some animal slowly turn colors and become a thing of beauty.

I never answered them. Just didn’t figure I need to, to be honest. So I started to ponder that thought while I rested in between trips back to the pit to ensure all was well. Don’t get me wrong my father and brother-in-law were both plenty capable at handling the task. I wasn’t there to undermine them. It wasn’t about them, it was about me. This unsaid, unseen but most certainly heard and felt calling of legacy. It was me being selfish, I do realize that.

See I my grandfather died almost two years ago. He was the greatest bbq-er, man of God and person I have ever known. My grandfather was a quiet, humble man. He was a sight to behold. He never raised his voice that I can remember, but when he spoke the whole world seemed to listen. He wasn’t a towering or physically imposing figure. He was just this spirit that you could feel enter the room. You could feel his eyes on you and you knew when he was thinking about you. You were always reassured when he said he ‘was praying for you and would be thinking of you.’ That alone was enough to make you stay on the right path. Not that he was mean at all, just the opposite in fact. He was the most giving person I have ever seen. He was poor and happy and would gladly give you his last vegetable out of the garden along with a nice helping of the word of God if you would listen. He was a great man. He was and remains in my mind what ever man should be. Strong, without having to make a fuss about it. Confident, almost stubborn but not to the point of being unyielding. Honest when asked a question, but never feeling the need to make commentary about everyone or everything.

My father and I started down the bbq path again a few months ago. Its something that is just in our blood so to speak and it has been my way to rub shoulders with my grandfather again. Admittedly doing the bbq thing with our last name and lineage has its own set of standards, baggage and not without pitfalls. Everyone expects you to be good, immediately. There is little room for error and you get compared to everything that was done right or wrong to the previous generation.

Thankfully we have had pretty immediate success and everyone has been rather gracious, even perhaps when they shouldn’t have been. Things have moved along much faster than I had anticipated and I cant help but feel its nothing less than my grandfather watching over us. I know I can hear his voice in my head when Im cooking and while my dad hasn’t ever said anything I am betting he has the same thing going on.

Sure I could attribute our success to a 6th sense of culinary intuition and perhaps that plays a role in all of it, but if I/we do have that its because we spent the time with my grandfather to develop it. I never got to watch him cook from beginning to end, but I was around enough to know what needs to be done. Aside from that just eating his bbq was an experience that I will never forget, never mind some of my first memories being inside of his bbq restaurant. He is the measuring stick where I am concerned and if I can come even close to him then I am truly standing on the shoulders of a giant.

The truth is no one in their right mind would bbq if given a choice. Its days of prep work, hours upon hours of sucking in smoke and eyes watering and getting very little in return. So why do I do this? Because quietly and humbling my grandfather did it. There is a quiet joy in making other people happy with your food and your creation. I don’t doubt that’s why he did it. Its hard work. It takes a steady head and hand. Its not for the faint of heart or anyone looking for a quick fix or win. In the end the more I think about it bbq and the life of a bbq-er are the perfect synonyms for my grandfather.

I do this because he did it and that is enough for me.

So this weeks blog wasn't completely inspired by this song but, I'm still giving this song credit because it just gets stuck in my head….and well these guys don’t get enough credit for being a really good band. So go buy all their albums. Really…go on get them all. They are all good.

Big Head Todd and the Monsters “These Days Without You” on their album Beautiful World. They have some more well known songs so go stumble through You Tube and see what you find. I'm sorry I couldn't find a good link to the playable version of These Days Without You. If I had better internet connectivity today I would upload one myself. All the more reason to go get the album I guess :)